On Love and Despair

Last night I had the amazing opportunity to celebrate mass with our priest and our Junior and Senior High Faith Formation classes. We had what is often called a "card table Mass" since we celebrated Mass in our Gymnasium. It was really everything I could have asked for. The students were mostly polite and engaged, good music, awesome message, great student involvement in ministries and of course Jesus was present! At the end of mass where "announcements" would usually go we had a prepared reflection about the wisdom of Solomon.

One of the most famous stories of Solomon's wisdom comes from first Kings Chapter 3 in the Bible, and tells of two women who came to Solomon asking him to solve their problem. The two women lived in the same house, both had given birth to babies within days of each other, and now one of the babies had died. Now both women were claiming that the baby that was still alive was their child. King Solomon asked one of his servants to bring him a sword. When the sword was brought to him he said, "Now, cut the live baby into two pieces and give each woman half."

One woman said, "No, please, my master, do not kill the baby. Give it to this woman." The other woman said, "Yes, cut the baby in two. Then neither of us will have him." King Solomon said, "Give the baby to the first woman because she is the real mother."

God gave wisdom to Solomon to make right decisions. God will give us wisdom and many other gifts if we only ask Him to.

As a child, hearing this story of Solomon always made me think "Wow, what a clever way to solve a problem." I never really had a reason to go back and look at the passage as an adult. (I will admit my Bible reading has been lax lately) As an adult my interpretation of this story is vastly different, rather than Solomon, I focus on the women.

Their babies we know were about the same age, must have been the same gender and still very young. If they were still very young and the one baby had recently died, both mothers still had the opportunity to nurse and care for the baby as if it were their own. Both women love their children but are going through a very traumatic time in their lives.

The first woman is clearly the voice of love. Love is self sacrificial in nature and would rather see the best of the other over fulfilling their needs. She would love her own child to the point of giving him up to see him live. She would also have the opportunity to still watch him grow and celebrate his milestones with him since they would live in the same home.

The second woman shows us the dangers of despair. Under the supposition we made above, their children are still relatively young. She has had the opportunity to see her child alive, hold him, nurse him and love him. Her response of "Yes, cut the baby in two. Then neither of us will have him." is not a response of hate but extreme loss and pain. Pain causes us to do uncharacteristic things. If they have both have been caring for the child as their own, she clearly cares for the child, but pain has blinded her saying, "If I can't have something, neither should anyone else."

The second woman's response is something I fight with often. It could be when a friend announces they are expecting, "Well why haven't we gotten pregnant yet?", when plans seem to always fall through, "It wasn't going to be that fun anyway", or when I'm just in a big blue funk, "If I can't enjoy this, no one can." I hope I'm not the only one who has battled with these thoughts. The important thing is that I don't get bogged down by them.

To Love Another Person...

My husband and I are huge musical theater fans. I am not ashamed to say that he is a bigger fan than I. It may not surprise readers that this being said, we are fans of the recent 2012 movie of Les Miserables. *sigh* I have linked to a Youtube clip of the audio.

While I'm not going to debate the Theology of the movie version (I'm still working on the book) I am using the music to make a point. During the Epilogue of the movie, Jean Valjean, at the end of his life sings one of my favorite lines in the show, "To love another person is to see the face of God."

On my Ignatian Prayer Adventure today I am naming my blessings. The biggest blessing that I have and gift that God has given me is that of Love. I can confidently say that I am loved by my husband, my family, my friends and last and not least, God. Yet I also love those I interact with. Each person I encounter is deserving of a different kind of love. My parents and my husband will always have a deep and prominent place in my heart; I have friends that I have adopted as siblings as I am an only child. I also love those I work with and for through what I complete during my days. Those that I love are gifts that God has placed in my life, and I would not be who I am without their love and influence.

Beloved, let us one another, because love is of God; everyone who loves is begotten by God and knows God. Whoever is without love does not know God, for God is love. 

1 John 4: 7-8

While I look at those that I love and love me, I truly see how God works through all of us in the world. This ability to see God in each other also comes from being created in God's image. If we were created in his image then we are also made for love.

Because of the love that comes from God, there are other gifts I have received: healing, mercy, joy, hope and faith. Each of these gifts could warrant an individual post of their own. I am grateful for these gifts and I each flows through my life and those lives that I touch.

I maybe digressing from my initial topic so I will return to it now. "To love another person is to see the face of God." Through the Catholic Teaching and Tradition, as well as my own experience, I believe that all human life is to be treated with love and respect just because they are human. I have recognized God in people simply because they are my fellow man. True, I have not seen Jesus' physical face, body, and human form, (unless you count the Eucharist) but I can recognize his love and grace in those I meet. 

To conclude my reflection for the day is to count what I am thankful for. I am thankful for my husband, family, friends, my job, basic necessities, this blog and my faith.

What are things that you are grateful for today?

Sunshine and Snowflakes and Darkness

Once upon a time when I lived in Iowa, I learned that Spring meant warm sunbeams and crazy western winds from the plains. When I moved back to Minnesota I thought Spring would come a bit later, the winds would be a little less and Spring would eventually come. This year, the winds have followed me from a direction I cannot find, and when we thought Spring had come, we got 13 more inches of snow. 

Nasty trick Winter, nasty trick.

There is something I cannot doubt though, Spring is "here". It is hiding like an illusive child but it is here. (I say this knowing that "Winter Storm Yogi" is going to drop more snow on us Wednesday/Thursday. *sigh*)

Today I started my second week of this Ignatian Adventure and I am beginning to work on the Examen. If you aren't familiar with this practice, it involves prayerfully looking through your day at triumphs and sins and asking to be forgiven as you strive to be better. I apologize if I'm off base with this. Part of the challenge is to walk around today and enjoy God's scenery.

When I read that, I chuckled and said "yeah right, the wind is kicking up enough where road salt is sand blasting my car." Then it dawned on me, while I was running errands today the primary thought I had was "Oh the sun feels nice, and I haven't seen the sky this blue for a while." There I was, basking in the beauty of God's creation between stores and my car, trying to find Red Vines for a friends birthday.

Regardless of what I was doing out and about, I am glad I made it outside today. It is a gorgeous day in Minnesota and I am happy to be here, even if I'm writing this blog.

Then at work, I start seeing posts and tweets about the Boston Marathon. Another great day to be outside until I realize that this isn't what these messages are about. There has been a bombing near the finish line of the Boston Marathon.

The first I heard of it was from a message that a dear friend sent that she was praying for the victims in Boston. I have since then been praying and keeping up with the news myself. Just last year I knew of a priest who was running the marathon who dedicated each mile to a different prayer request. He had prayed each of the 26.2 miles and I don't know if he was back again this year.

I can't tell you how many times as a "responsible adult" I've been asked why God lets evil happen if he is completely good. What I've learned is that evil is just an easy definition.

If you were to ask me explain mathematical concepts of subtraction or division, I could tell you that they don't really exist. Subtraction and division is just another way to explain a way of addition and multiplication. 5 - 3 can be explained the same as 5 + (-3). Division is the same as multiplying by a fraction. Any scientist will tell you there is no such thing as "cold". If it is cold outside, it is the same as saying there isn't enough heat for it to be comfortable. It would be the same to say that darkness is the absence of light, white is the inclusion of all color and black is the absence of all color. 

Evil is the absence of goodness and grace.

True enough, God has given of himself and God is all things good and filled with grace. To be blunt, the absence of God, his love, his grace, is what we call hell.

What happened in Boston is horrible, we cannot work fast enough to help everyone who is affected by this tragedy. This was not an evil act, this was an act done with the absence of love for one's fellow person. That being said over the next few days we will hear many other stories. Stories of grace and love. Stories of people who ran in where darkness prevailed. These people will be hailed as heroes, I am happy to call these people grace filled, compassionate, individuals who did what was right. They have tended to the wounded, cared for the grieving and brought love into an unloving situation. They are God's love and grace in action. They are living out the Corporal Works of Mercy in our midst.

Then as one person in southern Minnesota I will do what I can, I will pray for those who have been affected and pray that God's grace and mercy touches those who did this today.

Our Father who art in Heaven, hallowed be thy Name. Thy Kingdom come. Thy Will be done, on earth as it is done in Heaven. Give us this day our daily bread and forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who have trespassed against us. Lead us not in

to temptation but deliver us from evil. World without end. Amen